HOW DID I GET FROM THERE TO HERE

Have you ever wondered how you got to where you are today? I know I couldn’t have ever called the shots right for my life. As I look back my life seems to resemble one of those Family Circus cartoons when the kids are running all over the place and you see all the footsteps going every which way. Yep, that would be me.

When I graduated from high school all I wanted to be was a Math teacher. Well, one semester of college cured that. I had the Calculus teacher from hell. Then I switched to Elementary Ed, still along the teacher lines. Went along that path until they closed that door. Elementary Ed was flooded and they wouldn’t take any more into the program. Hmmmmm, what to do ……… I was good in math so the only thing I could think of that used math was accounting. It seemed like a natural fit for me. I whizzed along in that field, got my degree and even passed the CPA exam on my 1st try. I was on my way. Or so I thought. Started working in that field and never really liked it that much. OH, I was good at it but I hated auditing and taxes stressed me out. So much for the perfect profession.

Time went on, I had children and ended up homeschooling for 15 years. Sounds a bit like Elementary Ed to me, and I even got to teach high school math to boot. Seemed a bit ironic to me.

After my divorce, I ended up going back to accounting and enjoyed it alright, but with 4 special need kids it wasn’t long before kid issues got in the way and I had to pick kids over work. So much for that job. From then on it seemed that every time I got a job, even ones I liked a lot, kid issues got in the way. I would have to quit so I could take them to counseling, have them at home when they got suspended or do my weekly family sessions when they were in patient in psychiatric facilities hours away Needless to say me and a 40 hour workweek just don’t mesh.

Along came network marketing. I finally felt this was something I could do. The work hours were perfect and the commute, well there wasn’t one. This was something I could do and work around all the kids issues. I was at home and could deal with everything that came up. I signed up and worked one company and loved the products. In fact, I still use them. But the business end of it just didn’t fit well with me. After a couple years I switched to another company, Vitamark, and knew I was home to stay. Every time I think about getting a “J.O.B.” (Just Over Broke) I know I don’t want to work for anyone else. I want to be my own boss, make my own hours and take vacations when I choose. OK, I do some bookkeeping on the side but my real career is as a Professional Network Marketer. I love being able to help other people meet their needs via our products or our company. The truth is People do network marketing everyday, BUT they just don’t get paid for it. I Do!!!

Have a Fantastic day,
Charyl

GRANDKIDS

I love having Grandkids. It is so much fun. You get to spoil them and send them home. What could be better than that?

I just wish all my grandkids lived close. I miss those that live far away. I hate that I haven’t even been able to meet DL’s oldest son JA’s 3. They live in Washington and it is hard to get out there. One of these days I will get the privilege of meeting Megan (6), Thomas (5) and Ian (1) and playing with them. I am soooo looking forward to that.

Sydney (13) and Corey (11) live in Los Lunas, NM and that isn’t close either. I have been trying to get out there to see them for what seems like forever. I told JS that if it keeps up like this Sydney will be married before I get out there. OK she is only 13 but it feels like she and Corey are growing up and I am missing it. I am, once again going to try to get out there during Spring Break this year. Time will tell.

I get to see and play with the 4 grandkids that live here quite often. EN and I go to Community Bible Study together so we take the kids out to lunch every week after Bible Study. We all look forward to our weekly lunch. Timmy Jr (4) likes to go to Ole McDonalds which is his favorite. Eliana (6) is more into the Chinese buffet. Katrina (1) likes just about anyplace that has food. I watched them the other day and gave Katrina macaroni and cheese for the 1st time and she was so funny. She was putting that mac & cheese in by the fistful. I had wished I had a camera to capture the look on her face.

HJ is going back to college for her Masters in Education so I get to watch Kyleigh (1 ½) twice a week. Kyleigh loves books so I get to read about a 100 stories while I am there. OK, I often read the same ones over and over and over, but that is OK. She even sleeps with her books. She has loved books forever. When she was just able to crawl she would crawl over to her books, open them and look at them. She would even make them right side up.

My last 3 live in Oklahoma too but an hour and a half away. LJ’s 3, Nyesha (3), Jeremy Jr (2), and Gavin (6m) live in Ponca City. I don’t get over there often so I only get to see them once in a while or for special occasions. We kept Nyesha for a few days after Christmas. We had such a good time. She loves to go shopping and to have anything princess. Patty, esp., had fun spoiling her.

I never knew having Grandkids would be so much fun. I love them all so much. I am sure all you Grandmas can identify. For more pixs of my grandkids go to http://www.abandcs.com/ and click on their pixs. I have done a web page for each of my family.

Until next time – Chow,
Charyl

IN CHARGE REDS

I love to sit in the mall or anywhere really and try to figure out what color someone is. It is just a game to me and of course, I never really find out what color the person is. But you can sure tell a lot about a person by what they wear and how they carry themselves. OK, probably a warped kind of fun but I enjoy it. For me the Reds are the easiest to pick out. They dress to take charge, they dress for power. The females love to wear spiky heels and business suits. They are the ones dressed to the tee even if they are just shopping at Wal Mart. The Greens tend to dress perfect, too, but in a more subdued sort of way. Yellows are the casual dressers, wearing t-shirts and jeans or as Holly always wears - flip flops. Blues, well, they dress for flash, bright colors and Hawaiian shirts.

The Reds are the Corporate CEOs, Business owners, Doctors, Lawyers. The powerful ones. They are the ones motivated by money and power. They want to be in control and in charge. They are the “Get the Job Done” people. They represent 15% of the population. They are the hardest ones to parent because they think THEY need to be in charge and running the show. I have only been blessed with 1 in my life and she and I bumped heads from the moment she arrived. She, even at age 3, thought she should and could run the family better than I did. I don’t think there was a day peace until she grew up and moved out.

Reds have great strengths. They are amazing producers, the best negotiators and they have energy to burn. Reds are the risk takers, the leaders and the ones with the most confidence. They take action, are independent and will just take right off and start doing things. Unfortunately, they don’t care who they have to step on to get it done. Reds do have weaknesses that they need help with. The first thing is their ego, they think they are perfect, are always right, and are the only ones with an idea even though they are not. They are domineering, short tempered and just plain unteachable. Although they always seem to get a lot done, they are the hardest to be around or work with. I personally, have a tendency to run for the hills when I encounter a RED. I think they just intimidate me.

The world is made up of all 4 colors. Nurturing Yellow, Detailed Green, Fun-loving Blue and the In Charge Red. We need them all!!! We need the Yellows to take care of us and teach everyone. We need the Greens to figure everything out and take care of all the nitty gritty details. Blues keep us balanced and get us to not take everything so seriously. Reds keep things going by telling the rest of us what to do and how to do it. The world would not function correctly if we took any one color away. We all, no matter what color we are, have value.

To learn more about the Colors, check out the
Colors CD.

Michael Dlouhy is very good at teaching the different colors. He also does a monthly phone call about the Colors. If you are interested in listening to it, let me know and I will send you the info.

Have a wonderful day
And be sure to figure out your color,
Charyl

Blues Just Want to Have Fun

OK, if I could pick my color I would probably pick Blue. Blues just seem to have more fun and less stress. They seem to bounce along in life like Tigger. A Blues goal in life seems to be to have fun, fun, fun!!! Blues make up about 15% of the population. I personally have a few Blues in my life. DL, JA, KM and Timmy Jr show us how to take life a little less serious.

Let me tell you a little story about Blue Timmy Jr. A couple years ago, my daughter-in-law EN’s sister Janett got married. It was a small wedding at TA & EN’s house and TA, EN, Eliana and Timmy Jr were all in the wedding party. DL and I went to the wedding since we are friends with all of EN’s family. The wedding started and Flower Girl Yellow Eliana started into the room, spotted all the people and immediately went under EN’s dress. Somehow, with EN’s help she made it down the aisle and quickly retreated to her Nana Joanne’s lap. Ring bearer Blue Timmy Jr, on the other hand, started in, spotted all the people and realized he was in his element. He had the best time of his life. He KNEW every eye was on him. Once he got down the aisle he was held by one of EN’s sisters who was a Bridesmaid. Timmy Jr proceeded to entertain us through the entire ceremony. Now, I know Janett and Michael got married but I don’t think anyone “saw” much of the ceremony. We were all too busy watching the antics of Timmy Jr.

I remember JA as a child. He was always bubbly and smiling, always the life of the party. He made life fun. When he was a teen he would entertain everyone on Youth Group trips with his wild stories. I have always said he could sale ice to a freezing Eskimo.

Blues are the entertainers, actors and salesmen of the world. They know no stranger. They love people and are energized by spending time with lots of people. You can spot a Blue – they have Hawaiian shirt on, and the women love their costume jewelry and bright flashy colors. Everything about a Blue says look at me, notice me. They love the attention.

The strengths of a Blue personality are that they are excellent promoters, they're energetic, enthusiastic, bubbly, motivating, convincing, creative and always the life of the party. The weaknesses are that they are unorganized, scattered, poor savers, procrastinators and they're always speaking instead of listening. They love to do things on the spur of the moment, never planning ahead. Sometimes it is hard to rope them in and get them going in the right direction. They would rather just bounce along. In Gary Smalley’s world they are the otters. You can just picture a Blue as a Playful Otter. Works for me. They never gets ulcers, they are having too much fun to be stressed.

So, you see, wouldn’t it be fun to be Blue? They might not stay focused long enough to get a lot accomplished but they sure have a good time doing it.

To learn more about the Colors you can check out this
Colors CD. Michael Dlouhy is very good at teaching about all the different colors. He also does a monthly phone call about the Colors. If you are interested in listening to it, let me know and I will send you the info.

Have a good one,
Charyl

I am a GREEN, Oh NO!!!

I came to a rude awakening today and I am not sure I can cope. I realized I am a GREEN personality type. I have lived under the delusion that I was a yellow. I wanted to be yellow, I liked thinking I was yellow. It was a comfortable thing to be. Now I have to adjust to being something I wasn’t yesterday. Or at least I didn’t think I was.

You probably think I am nuts. Right??? Well, here is the deal. There are 4 basic personality types. My system calls them Red, Blue, Yellow and Green. I am sure you know them by something else but these are the ones I am used to. Today I did a personality test and it said I was GREEN. Then I read an article about kids and how they do homework. I thought back to when I was a kid – yep, Green. Then I went to lunch with Dennis and told him my revelation and he sweetly said “I’ve told you that. You are GREEN.”

There really isn’t anything wrong with being Green; I have lots of family that are Green. Heck, 35% of the population is Green. JS, TA, MM, PJ, JA, PM, LM and Granddaughter Sydney are all GREEN. But I thought I was Yellow like HJ, SS, EN and Granddaughter Eliana. Hmmmmmmm How could I be so wrong?

Let me tell you a bit about Greens. Greens are detail people. They love details. They have to have all the facts before they can make a decision. They are the perfectionists of the world. They are organized to a tee. Greens are the accountants, engineers, chemists, the analytical ones. OK, I don’t see myself that way even if I do have a degree in Accounting and that is one of the things I do for work. Greens are the ones dressed in the button up shirt with the collar and pocket protector. They are the quiet ones. They are the ones who don’t have a whole lot to say. They give short answers. They appear to be a bit uptight. Their strengths are that they are the most organized, great planners, dependable problem solvers, they are task persistent, accurate, and amazing on follow up.

The weaknesses of the Green personalities are that they over analyze everything, they're hard to please, easily get depressed, they can get into real problems with loneliness, and they are pessimistic about everything. Now that is not the way I see myself. Not now, not ever!!

I remember doing the Gary Smalley personality test a few years back and was a Beaver but I never transferred that over to being GREEN!!!! Like I said, I saw myself as a nurturing Yellow. Yellows are the Care Givers of the world. They, too, are 35% of the population. They are the school teachers and nurses, the ones taking care of everyone. They are the ones, like Holly who will pick up a stray dog just because it needs a home. They give from the heart. They are the ones who care deeply about others. They don’t have time for themselves because they are so busy taking care of everyone else. They are the best listeners, dependable, easy to get along with, they are TEAM players and the most patient of the personalities. Yellows are supportive and are the nurturers among the different personalities. NOW this is how I saw myself. Heck, I adopted 4 kids and feel like everyone has come before me for years. A yellow is casual and likes to wear casual clothes and isn’t all that concerned about what everyone else thinks about it. They are laid back and more relaxed. They aren’t concerned with all that stuff. They are the Golden Retrievers in the Gary Smalley world. See why that is what I wanted to be? It just sounds like much more fun. Alright they have some weaknesses too, they are over sensitive, they take things personally, they conform and buy other peoples excuses. OK, as a Green I probably get more done than a typical yellow but………..

No one is all one color. Everyone is a combination of them all. I thought I was mostly yellow with a second of green. But in reality I am pretty green with some yellow. I guess there is nothing wrong with living a bit in denial, right??? So how do you see me? Do you see me as Green or Yellow? To learn more about the Colors you can check out this Colors CD. Michael Dlouhy is very good at teaching about all the different colors. Find out what color you are!

Next time I will tell you about the Fun Lover Blues and the In Charge Reds. Until then....

Have a good one,
Charyl

STRESS

Stress has been my constant companion for the last 20 years. I get up with it and go to bed with it. It seemed to arrive and attach itself to my life the day my oldest adopted daughter, LJ arrived. What a pistol she was. For 13 years not a day went by without her picking a fight with me within 5 minutes of getting up. Sometimes physical but always verbal. There was nothing I could do to make it stop.

7 years after LJ’s arrival, KA arrived on the scene. He would scream 1 – 5 hours a day at the top of his lungs. Yep, that was fun. Fortunately that only lasted a few years. Then a year after KA, SA arrived, jolly little hyper guy that he was. Extreme brand of hyperactive. He was happy enough, he just didn’t sleep. On a good night he would sleep 2 – 3 hours. So you can see life was never dull at our house. Add to this home schooling and you can just imagine how STRESS arrived and took up permanent residence.

As the adopted kids got older, their issues got bigger and scarier. Mental illness and RAD was running rampant. Heck, right now SA, 16, is living in a residential treatment center a couple hours from out house.

Needless to say, I have stress to the max. Even went thru a period of panic attacks and super anxiety. Ended up a few times in the hospital thinking I was having a heart attack but it was actually just stress that had pushed my blood pressure up. Not FUN!!! One time my blood pressure was 230/130. I was a stroke looking for a place to happen.

The cool thing is that right after the last ER visit I found a product that I honestly feel has saved my life. I started drinking Limu Plus and my panic attacks and anxiety are a thing of the past. If I feel them coming on I just drink another ounce or 2 of Limu Plus and calm right down. I love the stuff. I don’t know if it would work for you like it did for me but I think it is definitely worth trying. And heck, there is a money back guarantee. For me, I feel I would either be dead or disabled with out it.

I don’t have a clue what is going to happen with SA. I don’t know where he will be living 6 months from now. I have no idea whether he will ever be safe to come home or not. But I know I can handle it without having any panic attacks or disabling anxiety. Plus my blood pressure will stay down and normal. Yeah!

So, if you can’t get rid of the stress, you just have to figure out a healthy way to manage it. Because life just goes on and on.

Until next time,
Charyl

A Mom I Am

I am definitely a mom. There is no way to get around it. Have been for over 40 years. I have 8 children and 4 step kids. Yep that equals 12!!! Life is definitely full for us.

It didn't start out to be like this. I had my 1st child my 1st year of college. It seemed like he would be an only child since I got divorced soon after he arrived. But 10 years later, I found myself married again and expecting #2. She was actually due on his 10th birthday. Go figure. But laid back as she is, HJ arrived a month later, weighing in at 10# 4oz. Then they just started arriving every 2 years. TA in '81 and JA in '83.

OK, some arrived by adoption. Adoption was something I decided I wanted to do when I was 12. I was adopted and decided I wanted to give a child the same opportunity that I had. I never wavered in that conviction. Finally in 1989 the time was right and we adopted our daughter LJ, who is #5 in the line-up. She came as a little 3 1/2 year old bundle of energy. My dream had finally come true. But bubbles burst and reality sets in. Things were not the way I had dreamed. LJ didn't adjust well, and of course I felt it was my issue not hers. I also thought it could be because she was the only adopted child in the family or the only black child. I had a lot to learn.

2 years later we decided to add to our family. I had always wanted a large family. Plus, I thought maybe another adopted child would help LJ settle in. So, PJ arrived. PJ was a sweet 3 1/2 year old. She settled in and adjusted in a couple weeks. LJ, of course, was still unsettled and fighting me every step on the way. The next few years were extremely rocky. Never a peaceful day. The older kids hated the stress and commotion, but life went on. My husband at the time was in the military so I was a "single" parent a lot of the time. What a life. Not one I would want to do over.

But life continues, we got out of the military and settled in the midwest. One day, out of the blue we received a phone call that PJ had a brother, and would we like to adopt him. Definitely not on my agenda but after much discussion we decided to give it a try. KA, age 5 1/2 came the summer of '95. KA was either introverted and scared of his own shadow or bouncing off the walls. Take your pick. About the time we got him settled and on the right medicine we received a call that KA's foster brother SA needed a new placement. Since K and S had missed each other that year we decided, again, after much discussion, to bring him home too. At this point in 1996 - SA was 4 1/2, KA 6 1/2, PJ 9, LJ 11, JA 13, TA 15 , HJ 17 and JS 27, out of the house and married with a child of his own. Life never settled down. It has now been 12 years since SA joined our family and I have not had a stressless day yet.

To add to the confusion, my husband and I divorced and I was left to parent the 7 kids myself. Actually this was a better situation since my ex had a hard time dealing with the kids and all their issues. I think he definitely got the easier end of the deal.

A couple years later, I connected with DL an old school friend who I had known since we were 8. We grew up 2 blocks apart in San Diego. We never dated tho he had written me a few love letters in grade school and even gave me a ring in 5th grade. OK it was out of a cracker jacks box, but it was the thought that counts. We were married in 2000 and I am now the proud step parent of JA 39, PM 21, KM 21 and LM 18.

I always wanted a large family but I never dreamed it would come about the way it did. Life is like a box of chocolates – “you never know what you’re gonna get."

To see more of my family check out my web page http://www.abandcs.com/

Have a wonderful day and we will chat soon.
Charyl